Who I Am

What I think is an important part of being a person is accepting the truth. Acceptance is the first step to change a bad habit, the first step to calmness when angry, etc. It is an essential for a person to be healthy, caring, and successful person without coming to terms with oneself. I have made a list below which contains many truths about myself, even if it is hard to accept. The harder a truth is to accept, the more growth one obtains when one finally comes to terms with it.

So here is my list of truths about myself I have come to terms with, and some changes I am trying to make for the future:

1. I am introverted

2. I do not like to interact with others for fear of embarrassment

3. I also do not like worthless 'small' talk which people make

4. I believe I am good at piano, at least decent

5. It is a form of enjoyment, but I have also used it to show off.

6. I am a decent tennis player.

7. I am a decent ping pong player.

8. I believe I am 'above average' in writing, at least for my age

9. I have lots of room to improve, and I should not criticize writing because its author is someone I dislike.

10. I am not a good writer compared to the books and papers I read. I will seek to improve my writing by reading and learning more.

11. I should seek better writers at my school to improve

12. I am not a disciplined person: I wake up late, I stay up late, I like reading novels without paying attention to time, I like video games a lot, and play a lot, I scroll on tiktok a decent amount, I am not the most tidy person, I am lazy.

13. I will, in the future, seek to improve in all of the 'discipline' section listed above. It will be hard, yet necessary.

14. I am often arrogant, because I have good grades, play piano well, play tennis well, and write well. I will seek to be more humble in the future.

15. I am selfish. Not that seeking to benefit oneself is bad, but I should not benefit myself while causing others harm because I am jealous, or because of my dislike of them.

16. I do not trust others. Not that wariness is a bad thing, but rather I often think bad of others in a certain situation, causing unnecessary tension between friends and family.

17. I would like to study philosophy in the future, and understand more about the world and myself through reflection.

18. I have been part of a Christian and Buddhist society in the future, and I would like to know what is the ultimate 'truth' of life. Currently the Buddhist 'theories' seem to interest and attract me more. I am learning more about it through meditation and online Buddhist course.

19. I would like to study creative writing in the future, and put all my dreams and daydreams onto paper stories that all can enjoy.

20. I am often disappointed by the lack of thinking many have on the world, and have found that only a small amount of people are willing to discuss philosophy, life, writing, books, and art with me. I am happy, though, that I have such a friend who understands me, and I have teachers that are willing to advise me in my path toward excellence and truth.

21. Above is but a section of my personality that I have come to understand and come to terms with, but it does not represent my whole personality. In fact it might only represent one percent of it. I will seek to understand more in the future